I take the Libyan: During the ceremony, the bride comes out with her face covered and a knife in her hand.
Libya is located in North Africa and is an Islamic state. Therefore, Islamic traditions are present throughout the wedding. However, customs can vary depending on the region - for example, a wedding in Benghazi may have slightly different elements than a celebration in the capital Tripoli. The influences of Arabic, Berber and Islamic traditions can be seen in various areas.
Jana, a young Czech woman working for an international organization, moved to Libya for a new job opportunity. Within the first few weeks, she met local architect Omar when she got lost in the historic part of Tripoli. Omar willingly showed her the way and told her about the rich history of the city. Their meeting evolved into deep conversations over coffee and gradually into a strong bond. Although they came from different cultures, they found a common language in their love for art and travel. After two years of relationship, they decided to get married - their wedding was a combination of Libyan traditions and Czech simplicity. Today they live in Tripoli and combine the best of both worlds.
Historical view on Libyan weddings
In Libya, a wedding is one of the most important events in life and the families of both fiancees very much appreciate this opportunity. Traditional weddings are grandiose and usually have an extensive guest list, because the more people, the better the celebration. In the past, Libyan weddings were a grand event that lasted almost a week, but today their length has been shortened to around three days, depending on the family's capabilities.
Although weddings are usually a matter of wealthier families, the government is trying to support young couples who cannot afford the high costs. According to data from the Development and Cooperation organization, young couples received a total of approximately 225 thousand crowns as a contribution to the wedding in 2021. The price varies by region and depends on several factors such as wedding dresses, banquet, musicians, and the number of guests.
Pre-wedding traditions
According to tradition, wedding preparations begin on Monday, when the bride and her closest friends go to the Hammam Bukhari - traditional Turkish baths. During this visit, she wears pink ethnic dresses and older women sing her wedding songs. This day is also dedicated to the henna ritual. After returning from the baths, a traditional dish called Reshta or Reshdit burma is served, which is specially prepared dough served with sauce. It consists of thin noodles (similar to homemade pasta) and a special meat broth.
The ceremony called Najma Saghira takes place on Tuesday, while Najma Kibira follows on Wednesday. However, these events often converge into one day today. Specifically, Saghira literally means "little star" and the star symbol is often used in this ceremony, which appears on various decorations, wedding dresses, or on the bride's jewelry. It is a ceremony that usually also includes a mixture of religious prayers and symbolic acts that represent blessing and request for happiness in marriage. In particular, Kibira is a significant traditional ceremony in Libya, which takes place during the wedding process and is considered one of the most important ceremonies within the country's wedding customs.
On Wednesday, according to Tripoli traditions, the groom's family comes to the bride's house for the official ceremony. During the ceremony, the bride sits on a traditional red chair with her face covered with a veil, while the women around her are dancing and singing. An important part of this tradition is a large basket with henna leaves, in which there is also a mirror and a small cosmetic set. The bride's task is to find the mirror in the basket, look into it, and then throw the henna leaves behind her back seven times. Each such throw symbolizes happiness and prosperity. After completing this ritual, single girls try to sit on the bride's chair – according to superstition, the one who succeeds first will be the next to get married. The groom's mother rubs the bride's hands with henna and gives her a wedding gift - a gold tiara called "Shenbeir" or a massive silver necklace "Khenaj", which weighs approximately one kilogram.
After this ceremony follows the "Sarir". This is a ritual that is unique to Libyans. Here, the bride appears before the family and guests with her face covered and is usually accompanied by family members to look at the sky. During the ceremony, the bride not only comes out with her face covered, but also with a knife in her hand. She unveils her face seven times and points the knife at the brightest star in the sky - a ritual that symbolizes "capturing the star of marriage".
In some areas of Libya, the bride performs another ritual during the henna evening. In Benghazi, she has to dip her feet in a silver basin of water, hold a mirror and a knife in front of her. This act symbolizes the beginning of a new life and fidelity to her husband.
Marriage contract
Men from the groom's family visit the bride's house to formally ask for her hand. If the bride agrees, the families meet and agree on the conditions of the marriage. An important part of this process is the conclusion of the marriage contract (katb el-kitab), which is usually signed in the bride's house and is a necessary step before the wedding itself. Traditionally, the groom's family gives a dowry to the bride at this occasion.
Wedding Attire
Although some Libyan women opt for modern wedding dresses, most brides wear a traditional outfit called harisa. This outfit is made of white silk and richly embroidered with gold and silver thread. It includes luxurious gold jewellery, heavy necklaces and a veil, symbolising modesty. Since Libyan weddings last several days, the bride changes outfits during the celebrations. During the part called Alboudri, when she receives gifts from the groom's family, she wears some traditional pink striped dress specifically fitted on the back and sides. The outfit is complemented by a matching pink veil.
The groom's outfit differs little from the usual Libyan attire. He usually wears a long white shirt (jalabiya), wide trousers (sirwal) and a knit vest (sadriya). This vest is heavily knitted from black silk and is buttoned up at the front. The whole outfit is complemented by a hat shashiyah, which is usually red or black. The outer cloak called "Jarid", that is usually worn in the style of a Roman toga, is worn differently in Libya. Here it is tied around the right shoulder and the remaining fabric is worn over the head.
Wedding Ceremony
The exact course of the wedding ceremony can vary slightly in different regions of Libya, but some customs are common. Given that Islam is the predominant religion in Libya, the wedding ceremony usually takes place in a mosque and is led by a religious leader - Imam.
Wedding Feast
Just like in most countries, the wedding feast in Libya is an occasion to celebrate with family, friends, and newlyweds. Guests gather in the wedding hall, where food is served, music is played and dancing takes place. One of the interesting customs is that the newlyweds eat separately from the other guests during the feast.
Traditional Food and Drinks
Although the offerings may vary by region, traditional Libyan meals are often served at weddings. The most popular are lamb and chicken dishes, as well as rishda - spicy pasta with sauce.
Even after the wedding banquet, the celebrations don't end. One of the last wedding traditions is showering the bride with rice and sweets as she leaves for her new home. This custom symbolises a sweet and happy beginning to the newlyweds' shared life.
Greetings etiquettes
Greetings are a necessary part of Libyan culture. Handshakes are common among men, while men and women usually don't shake hands.
Instead, they verbally greet each other with polite phrases. The most common greeting is "Asalaamu alaikum" ("Peace be with you"), to which one could respond "wa alaikum salam" ("and with you"). If you are invited to a home, bring something sweet, like pastries, fruit or a small gift from your native country.
If a man is to give a gift to a woman, he should say it is a gift from his wife, mother, sister, or another related woman. A small gift for children is always a pleasure. Gifts are given with both hands or the right hand, and they are usually not opened upon receipt.
Cuisine
The Libyan cuisine includes traditional dishes such as "bazeen" (food similar to porridge), "cuscusa" (couscous), "sharmoula" (herb and spice marinade), and "qatayef" (stuffed pastry). These dishes vary regionally.
Grilled meat, especially skewers and kebab, are also a characteristic feature of Libyan cuisine. Lamb, beef and chicken are commonly used, and are often marinated in a spice mixture before grilling. Libyan cuisine includes a variety of spices and herbs, including cumin, coriander, cinnamon, and mint. In Libya, wood-fired ovens are commonly used to bake bread and prepare dishes like "marguez" (spicy sausages) and "pizza libyana". Sweets often contain ingredients such as dates, honey and sesame seeds. "Atayef" and "qurma" are popular desserts, especially on festive occasions.
The Libyan tea culture is robust, with black tea being a popular choice. It's often brewed strong and served sweet. Libyans are also known for their warm hospitality. Visitors are always offered tea, food, and often accommodation. Refusing such offers is considered rude.
Family and Community
Family is fundamental for Libyan society, and strong community ties are essential for support and social cohesion. Gender roles are traditionally defined, with men and women often occupying different social spheres. Changes, however, are taking place mainly in urban areas.
Same-sex marriage
Marriage between two persons of the same sex is illegal in Libya. Since 1953, same-sex status and same-sex sexual activities are illegal. There is no protection against discrimination for same-sex spouses, and they cannot use the rights and benefits available to opposite-sex couples. There are also no adoption or inheritance rights, and this kind of marriage or union can be punished with up to five years in prison.
Polygamous marriages
Polygamy is recognized and legal in Libya. The country abides by sharia law principles, which permit polygamous marriages. A man can marry as many women as he wants. However, polygamous marriages in the country have been declining over the years.
Spousal rights
Libya differs from many Arab countries when it comes to spousal rights.
Unlike other countries, where a man has the right to divorce just by saying the word "talaq", three times, in Libya, a divorce must be approved by the court. Even if a man utters "talaq", his decision is invalid unless he files an official complaint with the court. Women in Libya also have the right to ask for divorce (called "khula") and must give up financial claims if they are found guilty of dissolving the marriage.
If spouses agree on divorce, children are usually entrusted to the mother's care until they become independent. Spouses have the right to decide whether to have children and in what number. Parents can raise their children according to their own religious and moral beliefs.
The wife is entitled to financial support from her husband and the right to protection against any form of harm. Although a man cannot demand unconditional obedience from his wife, it is expected that she will be present in the household. Spouses are considered equal partners under the law, however, the man is officially considered the head of the family and the legal representative of the children, while the woman is the primary caretaker. Both spouses can freely exercise political, civil, cultural, and religious rights, including the right to run for public office. Inheritance rights are the same for women and men, and both can freely handle their property.
Marital Duties
Given that Libyan society operates according to the principles of Sharia, the duties of spouses are based on Islamic law. Spouses are jointly responsible for the smooth functioning of the family. The financial care of the household mainly falls on the man, but if the woman has sufficient means, it is expected that she will contribute. The woman is in charge of managing the household and taking care of the children. They are expected to respect and support each other. The husband has a duty to ensure that his family respects his wife, just as it is expected from the wife to respect his family.
Libya is one of the largest Arab countries and its wedding traditions are diverse. Marriage is governed by a combination of civil and religious law, with only state-recognized civil marriages having legal validity. Religious and traditional ceremonies are common, but have no legal force. Brokered marriages or online marriages are not permitted in Libya. When entering into a marriage, both parties must be physically present. After obtaining an official marriage certificate, however, couples can organize celebrations according to their ideas.
Everyday Life
Living in cities such as Tripoli or Benghazi can be challenging, as residents have to deal with frequent power outages, lack of fuel and water, as well as deteriorating health and educational services. Nevertheless, people have a strong sense of family and social support. Many Libyans value friendship and community cohesion.
Education and Health Care
Education is available in most areas, but the quality of education can vary depending on the location. Many young Libyans choose to study abroad, especially in Arab countries or in Europe. Healthcare also struggles with problems such as lack of equipment and staff, especially in remote areas.
Current Challenges
Libya still faces many challenges, such as low levels of political stability, economic problems, high unemployment, limited access to basic services, and occasional violence. These issues affect the daily life of Libyans and contribute to the overall difficult situation in the country.
Despite all the possible negative things happening around Libya, a Libyan wedding is full of colors, joy, and traditions that are unique to them.
Source: author's text, theknot.com, rjtravelagency.com, marryonchain.com, eucarlwears.com
